WPGC - Week of Jan 27th, 2008

Week of Jan 27th, 2008

Hello Justine Love,

I have a serious issue that I am dealing with and I hope that you can either help me out on your show tonight or send me a reply. I'm a 25 year old attractive Black/Hispanic male, and I'm homosexual, however I've never had a sexual encounter with a male and I don't ever plan on having one. I am very very VERY conservative and I am strong in my "goals and dreams". I want a house, a marriage, kids the whole nine and I don't feel that I can have all of that "comfortably" with a male partner. Now here's the BIG QUESTION: I've always had girlfriends since I was about 14, but I'm not sexually attracted to women at all.....whatsoever...in no shape or form. When I tell women that I want to wait until I'm married they respect my decision because like I told you in the beginning I'm a conservative cat so that statement fits my personality so girls don't think that I'm hiding something. But the truth of the matter is I couldn't get it up if I tried. So is there something I can do about this??? Maybe medication, hypnosis, a certain type of food? lol .HELP ME PLEASE!! Or should Ijust give up on the whole white picket fence theory???

Dear J...

What a lot you revealed!

Sexuality is a complicated issue and yours truly is. You need to get in touch with what your sexual orientation is.

I can't help you to decide whether to be heterosexual or homosexual but if your values are as strong as you say then follow them but be true to yourself. Don't live a lie it only hurts you and all others that are involved in the lie by association.

There are several organizations that you could go to talk and I assure you they will listen and provide you with great resources.

SMYAL (Sexual Minority Youth Assistance League), US Helping US and Advocates for Youth are couple of great organizations to begin with.

Always if no one told you they love you today… I do

Justine

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Question: Do all men in prison lie and use people??????

Hello Justine and thanks for taking the time to read this letter,

My question is basically this….I think I may even know the answer but hey asking for help never hurt anyone. I’ve been dealing with this guy who has been in prison for the past 10 yrs. I’ve known him for about 2 ½ years, our relationship has grown and I know that I’m in love with him however, I’m not to sure if I am making a mistake. He keeps telling me know matter what, when he comes home next year even if we’re not together in a relationship, we will always be friends. He’s very religious and doesn’t want to rush into anything. He says he has been praying about us and that he is waiting for GOD to lead him in the right direction. You see I’m a full figured female and that is something I know he HATES, but tries to be nice about it. I feel so stuck and torn at the same time. He’s actually the only man that I’ve had any contact with besides the men I work with or family members. I feel empty when we don’t talk or I don’t visit. I’m not to sure about what to do. Right now things are confusing since on one hand he’s saying let’s wait on the Lord and then on the other he says you may not be the one for me. What do you think? Man this is crazy and I want to just run but I am so caught up right now.

Thanks again

Sissypaige

Response:

Invest in a pair of good sneakers and then run for your mental and emotional life.

You were right -you knew the answer to your question. It is not a question of whether men in prison lie and use people, it is the fact we allow people to set us up for emotional rollercoasters because we are so needy.

I never question anyone’s religious beliefs, but I do question when one uses God as a tool to not tell the truth.

This man has said to you that he really doesn't want to be in meaningful relationship with you but he does want your attention.

Sissy, wake up and move on, your Mr. Right is definitely Mr. Wrong for you. You have got to believe that you deserve better and value your worth. Alicia Keys and Maxwell sang it so well; listen to the words in “Woman's Worth”.

Always remember if no one told you they loved you today I do.....