I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for a little over two years. The problem that I am having is that he’s bad when it comes to paying the bills. I usually go ahead and pay the rent and other household bills from my account but he is suppose to give me half of everything back when he gets paid but sometimes it seems he get forgetful. And I always ask,” Why is there a problem with you paying your half the same bills come around every thirty days. It has gotten to the point where I hand him an invoice with our monthly bills every month. Just this past month he has not paid any household bills and didn’t pay his half of the rent. I handed him a voided check this past Tuesday, and told him to see if his job will allow half his pay to go directly to my checking account and I said let this be the last time you think you don’t have to pay rent. Justine, I do love him but he is trifling and he is sincerely a sweet man. He was raised by a single mother, who did not show or obviously tell him the facts of life about being a responsible adult. All she did was baby him and it’s so apparent. We are planning to move to another apartment and I was thinking about talking to him about getting his own place for awhile. But the only thing with that is he’ll think that I am breaking up with him on the sly. And he may start acting stupid because he is the epitome of a DRAMA KING. I don’t know what to do about anything. I just want out.
Sincerely
Tired of raising my boyfriend
Dear Tired of Raising My Boyfriend,
How is this as a novel idea ...STOP IT!!!! .. You must enjoy the drama because you are an active participant. People treat you the way you allow them to treat you. Let's reclaim your dignity. Sisterfriend, you are intelligent, beautiful and gainfully employed. You can not teach an adult how to be responsible. You have given two years of life and sometime we need permission to move on when we are not in a nurturing relationship. So, let's start with a clean slate. You are in charge of your happiness. Celebrate you and stop blocking the blessings of the Mister Right that is waiting for you. I promise you that loving someone sometime means letting them go and loving the most important person which is you.
Maybe one day he will get it right but not at your expense.
Remember if no one told they love you today…..I do
Always, Justine
